Won and Done!!!!

So you all know I finally got to meet my birth mother on Dec. 22. I'm not sure if it's really hit me yet. Possibly in a few days. Anyhow, Ms. Oh and I went down to Busan Wed. morning. Once we got there we went to the area where my birth mother suggested. We scouted out a coffee shop that was quiet and had a place where we could talk peacefully. Then Ms. Oh and I had some lunch before the meeting. At 3:00 P.M. she was waiting downstairs outside the coffee shop. I was sitting in the back waiting for Ms. Oh to come back with her. She came back and said she was already waiting outside the building. My birth mother sat down, didn't really look at me, and Ms. Oh walked away to go get our coffee. So I sat there with my birth mother without saying a word for a good 30 seconds. About 10 seconds in the tears started flowing.

The meeting went by pretty fast, we were only together for 40 minutes. But, it was definitely a good 40 min. The first thing she said was that I looked like her younger sister. Something as simple as that melted my heart. It's hard to explain that feeling when I look different from my ENTIRE family. But to finally see the face of the woman who gave birth to me and we have the same nose, double eye lids, and aparently similar teeth (according to her) it's just surreal. It's not something I can explain.

I was really worried that she wouldn't be too happy to see me. From the way Ms. Oh had told me about her talks with my birth mother it sounded like Ms. Oh put a lot of pressure on her. I do know that she does have a family and that she doesn't want them to know about her past and I respect that. But, I was just glad that she agreed to meet with me. And I could tell that she was glad she agreed to it too. Even if it was hard for her. To know that we can't contact each other again for quite a long time, but hopefully some day will be able to. She did request a picture of myself and the man I choose to marry. So, when that time comes I will send a picture to Eastern Social Welfare and hopefully they can get it to her. But until then there will be no more contact with her. I am OK with that. And I didn't even have to make myself pretend that I'm OK with it. I really am OK with that. Yes, I see a few of my friends who have good relationships with their birth families. But, for me, if it had happened then cool. If not, then cool. I have the best parents in the world and no one could take their place.

Some things I found out about my birth mother that she apparently passed down to me are her quiet nature when first meeting strangers. Her sensitivity likeliness to cry in emotional situations. Her puncutality, her nose, and her eyes.

As far as my birth father goes. Eastern has sent him a telegram which was actually given to his wife, but he has not tried to get in contact with Eastern. Ms. Oh said she will try again in Jan. That sometimes people don't respond, or wait and think about responding, or in my birth mothers case respond right away. For my birth father, whether or not I meet him isn't so important. I don't hold a grudge against him for not wanting to be with my birth mother anymore and deciding to give me up for adoption. For adoptees it's more the birth mother who is the most sought out.

This has been a LONG time coming and a great Christmas present. I had no idea that a year ago I would be living and working in the country of my birth and getting to meet my birth mother. If someone had told me that last December I think there would have been about a 50/50 chance I would believe them.

So here I am Monday at 3 PM sitting in a FREEZING classroom by myself. haha Such is life. But, 48 days until I get to go home!!!! For two weeks anyways. Definitely looking forward to Oklahoma. Back to where people speak English, back to good mexican food, back to family and friends. But until then...Winter camp must go on.